Self-help gurus tout the goal of balance in life. Work hard, play hard. The theory of balance has wisdom and is almost the goal that one could strive for if life were as simple as a seesaw. If, at any point, one does more than the other, then life is out of balance. And when balance is the goal, and one side happens to be the tiniest bit emphasized, then the goal isn't met, and feelings of guilt or shame commence. The effort to be balanced becomes its own axis of a three-dimensional teeter totter, causing it to spin and go up and down.
Awareness of working too hard and losing sight of priorities such as family, friends, and health is important. Being aware of playing too hard with work underperformance and unhealthy choices is too. But finding a permanent 50-50 mix is impossible. Instead of a playground apparatus, life can be viewed as a symphony.
In a symphony, there are multiple sections of instruments, and each has a more important role at different times of the performance. The maestro cues the violins, and a beautiful string tone rises. After a stanza, the maestro introduces the low rumble of the timpani drum and then adds the cellos while the violins fade out. This ebb and flow of instruments creates incredible harmonies.
Life is like this, and provided we live with intention, we know we will have to work long hours. Other times, our family needs will take over. As those fall away, we can focus on ourselves and replenish our energy. When we make conscious choices, are aware and accepting of the outcomes, and communicate to those our lives impact, we are conducting our lives' symphony. We must recognize when instruments get out of tune, or one section does the wrong amount of playing and adjust to regain rhythm.
Each person we encounter has their own symphony they are conducting. While one person's personal life is a crescendo, another's professional life may reach a rallentando. As leaders, we often have our outcomes in mind and communicate a one-size-fits-all plan. Changing our priority or adding something to the plates of others will most certainly disrupt any delicate balance. A lack of awareness of the musical tempo of people's lives causes a beautiful concerto to sound more like the din of an orchestral warm-up.
Leaders understandably become upset or frustrated when someone is underperforming or acting abnormally. I often fail as a leader when I am met with unexpected ire, and my natural reaction is to snap back. I am caught off guard, and Newton's 3rd law kicks in. Their action creates my equal but opposite reaction. As the maestro of that symphony, the results are like a middle school garage band and not the Philharmonic. Instead, a better outcome is more likely if the other's action is met with curiosity.
If a person is underperforming, asking them if they are doing ok and need any support is a much better approach than diving right into all the reasons they are disappointing you. The reason may be mundane, like they are bored or don't realize they are not meeting your expectations. Or it may be worse, such as a sick child, parent, or a separation from a significant other. Each of these can be met with a different reaction, but knowing what is happening to cause their work to be out of tune guides the leader on the next step to rebuild the harmonic.
And do not, unless the person truly needs it, ever treat them like they are the percussion section.
Image generated from ChatGPT
Comments
Post a Comment